Dating and Relationship Advice

Two years ago I decided to end a textationship with a guy I met on a dating app. We chatted over text for a month and we lived in the same city. So what was the problem? Meeting in person was supposed to be a breeze right? But he seemed to feel way too comfortable in our virtual relationship.

Ending it wasn’t easy but if you’re someone like me who prefers real-life conversation, you’ve got no other option but to end a text-only relationship like the one I had.

How to End a Textationship?

The first thing to do before you end a textationship is to get clear why this type of relationship isn’t working for you. Just like a breakup, you need to be clear on why your life is better off without this person.

It sounds selfish but hears me out: there are many recipes on how to build a healthy relationship but only texting isn’t one of them. It’ll only get you to end up in a long-distance situationship -even if you live in the same city.

Once you’re clear on your “why”, it’s easier to let go. Only then you can start communicating with them. There’s no shame in admitting that your feelings hurt because you feel like you deserve more than just a textationship.

Unfollowing them on social media and maintaining the no-rule contact can also be very helpful. You already knew it’d never work out with them so why keep them in your life?

People sometimes think they need to still keep in touch with their exes because they don’t want to be the villain. But as long as you’ve done a tactful breakup in the beginning, then you don’t owe them anything anymore.

How to Avoid a Textationship?

Here’s how to avoid a textationship the next time you’re back on the dating pool:

  • Share your experiences and your expectations with the new person and don’t wait until you feel “comfortable”. You want both ends to understand each other’s needs as early as possible.
  • Initiate a first date and if you want, also pick a place to meet. In cases where you live in different cities, at least you can set up a video call so you can see face-to-face. Move the texting phase to talking over the phone.
  • Make it a priority to connect emotionally in person. And avoid talking about serious topics over the text.

Overall, there are many types of textationships out there and for each, the signs can be subtle. The best thing you can do is to listen to your gut and follow it through.

What to Do After Your Textationship Has Ended?

So what to do after you end a textationship? Is going back to the dating pool right away sound like a good idea? It depends.

Some people developed trust issues from such experiences. To end a text only relationship can be mentally draining as you tried to cut ties with someone who’s part of your life.

However, if you’re confident and ready to connect again with someone new then you can do it too. It’s also important to be in a place where you can meet someone who wants the same thing as you do. And Iris Dating provides just that. It’s a place where you can have healthy communication with someone you’re attracted to.

And because it’s necessary for each user on Iris to have a mutual physical attraction, you won’t likely find someone who just wants to text all the time.

So, don’t let the bad experience hold you back from being open to a new love. As long as you know how to spot a textationship, avoid falling into dry texting and not make the same mistake, then you’re all good.

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