Dating and Relationship Advice

“Will he find me attractive?”

“Is this the right person for me?”

“Will anyone ever love me?”

Dating anxiety is a thing. A big thing. Who hasn’t been there? Getting so nervous before a date that you end up sweating through your shirt — or getting in your head so much that you can’t seem to squeak out one sentence. While dating anxiety affects everyone at least a little, some may find it debilitating.

Got dating anxiety? Here are some reminders that can help keep you grounded before, during, and after the date.

Remember that everyone gets anxious

Even the most confident, sexy, carefree people feel anxious about dating sometimes. Frankly, if someone tells you they never get anxious about dating, either they’re lying or they aren’t invested in the dates they’ve been on. Remember, the person you’re going on a date with is probably just as nervous as you are.

Trust your gut

If you meet someone who is right for you, your anxiety probably won't feel all-consuming for long. And the opposite is true — if a date feels like too much, you might be trying to force something that will never work. Listen to your gut and be true to what you feel. I know, easier said than done, right? Just do your best.

Be yourself

Yes, it’s cliché, but being yourself is the best thing you can do when going out on a date. If you try and change who you are early on because you’re anxious about what the other person will think of you, you’re just setting yourself up for hurt. Be genuine, as scary as it is, and you’ll be rewarded with someone who’ll love you for you, even if it takes kissing a few frogs.

Nothing worthwhile is easy

Dating should not be easy. It shouldn’t be rife with fear and anxiety, but it will not be a walk in the park. That’s because nothing worthwhile ever is. In order to meet someone who fits your needs and desires (and vice versa), you need to put in the work to find them. And this means going on dates. Yes, some will be terrible. Oh yes, some will end in heartbreak. But eventually, you’ll find one that ends in your own version of happily ever after.

Very few people end up alone

Many are so anxious about dating because of the pressure to find someone – whether that pressure is internal or external. But here’s some good news: statistically, most people don't end up alone. So, in reality, the odds are ever in your favor.

Hopefully these reminders will help you tackle your dating anxiety, put it in a headlock, and keep it on the mat so you can enjoy your damn dates.