Spring: The Season of the Singles
It’s almost spring! I can already hear the birds chirping, smell the grass growing, and feel the warm sun on my cold, pale, winter-saddened face. I’ve also begun spotting the un-cuffed creeping out of hibernation and preparing for the Season of the Singles.
There is literally no better time of year to be single than spring. No biting cold keeping you inside or bulky sweaters hiding bodies, and no summer swelter that makes makeup run and thighs chafe.
Single people: Spring. Is. Your. Moment.
But why? Here are all the reasons why spring is the best time to be single.
Hibernation is over
Picture a bar in the middle of January. Dead. Cold. Sad. Now, picture that same bar on a gorgeous, sunny, spring afternoon. Packed. Laughter. Beer towers. Sunglasses. See what I mean? Just like bears, humans come out of hibernation in the spring. And just like bears, the hibernation has made us thirsty.
It’s mating season
Remember in Bambi when it was spring, and all the cute cartoon animals started coupling off? As the skunk described it, they were “twitterpated.” That’s a real word. It means infatuated or obsessed, and it's actually used to describe animal and human behavior in spring. Animals are hardwired to want to reproduce in spring, as the newly warm weather makes it easier to find food. While humans don’t have to worry about foraging—unless you count reaching to the back of the shelf for your favorite yogurt flavor—our sex drives definitely tend to spike in spring.
All the date activities are back
If you don’t like ice skating or are sick of watching movies, you’re pretty much screwed when it comes to wintertime dating. But come spring, all the best date activities are back! Picnics, boat rides, biking, chic rooftop bars, outdoor dining, hikes, and even just romantic walks among the flowers are all ready and available for your next rendezvous.
You’re your best self
If winter is for chowing down on comfort foods and snuggling under blankets, spring is for salads and hitting the gym. I don’t know if it’s the threat of swimsuit season that gets us off our butts or we’re simply inspired by the sunshine, but spring is the time when you’re most likely working to become your best self. Hitting the gym and eating right will not only have you looking fierce and fabulous to attract new dates, but will also increase your libido.
Need I say more?
For those that aren’t aware, spring fashion is literally the most flattering of all the seasons. You’re not hidden under massive sweaters and scarves that double as blankets, and you’re not dripping sweat into your already soaked tank top and shorts. Instead, we’re talking chic jeans that show off that booty, cute tees and blouses tucked in, and for the ladies, the oh-so-powerful sundress.
So, go forth, my romantically unattached friends. Live your best lives in this, the Season of the Singles.