Dating and Relationship Advice

The short answer is yes. You can date someone you don't find attractive. No one is stopping you. The big question is will it last? Probably not, but that really depends on different factors. Here at Iris Dating, attraction is a very crucial element in finding a successful match. When someone thinks of the word attraction, it is most likely the physical attraction they picture. Most people might not consider other types of attractions at first because physical attraction is hard-wired.

Is Physical Attraction Important?

This is a personal question and varies depending on whom you ask. My answer is that it is not the most important, but it has a role in relationships. Physical attraction can make people want to learn more about another person's hobbies and interests, leading to a deeper connection. But some people might not consider physical attraction the utter most crucial factor. But does physical attraction help you in finding a more substantial match? Absolutely. Mutual attraction helps relationships succeed. People who settle for a relationship in which they aren't physically attracted to their partner can end up unhappy in the relationship.

Physical attraction and other attractions go hand in hand, but physical attraction is where it starts. That attraction pulls you in and helps you find the others. If there is nothing but physical attraction, you can always choose to move on and find someone that provides all your attraction needs.

Iris Dating wants its users to first start with physical attraction. Yes, you can date someone that you don't find attractive. That means there would be no mutual attraction, and if there is no emotional or romantic connection to fuel the passion, it most likely won't last. The same can go for a physical connection without emotional or romantic attraction. At least if you have a physical connection, you have something to build onto and form those other attractions.

Story Time: I Tried to Date Someone I Wasn't Attracted To

Spoiler alert, it didn't work out. However, I don't think it was because I didn't find him attractive. What ended things was that we had NOTHING in common. Due to our incompatibility, I could not be romantically attracted to him, which led to me being physically unattracted to him. The point of this brief story is that everyone is wired differently, and certain attractions are more critical than others.

Personally, I need to have romantic feelings for someone to want to try to go for something serious. Physical attraction is a plus to me. I've thought plenty of people were good-looking but did I want to date them? Nope.

I've had it backward as well. I wanted to date someone I wasn't physically attracted to at all. He helped me out a lot and was kind to me. That's what attracted me to him. What killed it for him is that he was interested in me because he thought I was "above average," and he was "above average," too. This logic led him to believe that we were a good match. That turned me off faster than anything.

Attraction Doesn't Always Mean Physical

There is more than one way to be attracted to a person. Exhibit A is the story I just told. I was drawn to example #2 because he appeared to be kind. Unfortunately, he turned out to be kind of conceited. What I was feeling at the time was an emotional attraction. Example #1 didn't work out for me because we didn't have anything in common. We weren't connecting emotionally, which killed our chances of a romantic attraction. These two suitors weren't fulfilling my needs for emotional and romantic attraction.

If you want to increase your chances for online dating, try iris and discover matches based on mutual attraction.


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